The Big Diehl

Christianity is not about being a good and nice person. Oh, no. Not at all. God is not always nice. If you don’t believe me, check out Amos 2 and tell me that God isn’t totally ticked. And we can’t forget the story of Jesus getting so angry he cracked a whip - literally. The examples go on and on. My God is no wimp.

For God’s Sake, Get Angry!

Think about what that actually means: get angry for the sake of God. We need to get angry about the things that make God angry. Get angry at injustice in the world. Get angry at your sin. Get angry that people you know are heading to hell. If you’re not angry at these things, you’ll never move to action. For God’s sake, get angry! Maybe in the comments below you can help me compile a list of other things that make God angry? Go for it, you know you want to.

Don’t be a wimp - get angry.

An invertebrate is an organism without a backbone.

You’re an invertebrate Christian when you have no convictions or passions of your own. The most common example of this is legalism. Legalists do right things because of their pride or what others say — not because of their own convictions.

I’m sick of girly Christianity filled with Christians without backbones. “I am not ashamed of the gospel!” To not be ashamed of something that many people scoff at takes a lot of guts — we need to have passion and convictions to live for God… and these passions and convictions need to come from deep down inside.

Christianity has little room for wimps - get a backbone.

A weightlifter plans a workout to focus on specific muscle groups. When I lifted regularly, I would often do five or more exercises to focus on just one muscle group. My goal was always to do three sets of each exercise with increasing intensity. What was the natural result of my hard work? –Sweat.

I climbed a small mountain once in Honduras in 100 degree weather so that I could play a concert for a school at the top of that hill. It was extremely difficult. What was the natural result of my hard work? — Sweat.

I’ve seen construction crews build structures. Many construction workers have physical strength that boggles my mind because they consistently lift very heavy things while building. Construction work is just that — it’s work. What is the natural result of this hard work? –Sweat.

I’ve never seen anyone with the ability to voluntarily control their sweat glands. It can’t be done. Sweat is simply the natural result of hard work. If you work hard — you’re going to sweat.

Imagine evangelism being a little more like the sweat of a Christian.

Imagine a Christian who spends lots of time asking God to touch the lives of their friends. Imagine a Christian who completely opens their life to God and offers their entire self to the work of God. Imagine a Christian who will spend time at the feet of Jesus reading His Word. Imagine a genuine and passionate Christian. What is the natural result of this hard work? — Evangelism.

Evangelism is the natural result of a genuine and passionate Christian.

A Christian that is working hard at their relationship with God is going to sweat.

This past weekend was my church’s annual Conference on Global Evangelism. One missionary shared with us a video that included a testimony of an Afghanistan missionary. She said that Afghanistan is a very difficult place to share the gospel. They are not reaping a harvest. They are not even planting seeds. Its so closed to Christianity at that area, they have to go through the soil and chuck rocks before they can even plant the seeds of evangelism.

They chuck rocks.

I had never thought of that. Let me try to translate that for the United States’ culture.

Many homosexuals reject Christianity because they think all Christians believe that homosexuals will go to hell simply because they “are” homosexual (I do not believe this is necessarily true). So some homosexuals are dead set against Christianity. Before being able to plant any seeds of evangelism here — you would need to chuck some rocks.

A friend of mine recently shared with me a story of how foreign exchange students from Europe were dead set against Christianity because as children, they were taught that the Bible was filled with contradictions (which they never bothered to discuss). They were taught this in their public schools.  Before planting any seeds of evangelism to people like this, you need to chuck some rocks.

Recently I have been running into a man who isn’t ready to accept Christ . . . but he is getting closer and closer. He told me that a few months ago he would have punched me in the face simply because I told him I was a Christian. Just imagine — that’s how much he hated Christians! But he’s actually open and talking with me about Christianity and faith in God now. I’m able to plant seeds with him right now — but according to his story, there was someone else before me who had done a lot of rock chucking with him.

How To Chuck Rocks

Live your life.

Live your life around those with “rocky soil.”

Live your Christian life around those with “rocky soil.”

When the person sees your genuine and passionate Christian life, you will be chucking the rocks. That’s the most basic expression I can think of — but also the most descriptive. To live a Christian life means that we will live with purpose — God’s purpose. That general purpose is the same for every Christian: As we go into the world . . . make disciples.

My Shoes Fart.

I’m serious. I just got these new multi-toned brown leather shoes yesterday. Today, every step I take on my left foot sounds like an expulsion of air. If this happened in 7th grade I would take the credit for the sound myself and would be the most popular kid in middle school — but since I’m older I guess it won’t do anything for my social status.

My Paper Clips Had a Party. 

I don’t use paper clips very often, but I went to grab one today and I discovered that someone had connected them together — all of them.  Since the culprit obviously just wanted to pull a gag and get some attention, I figure I’d give it to them here on my blog. Way to go, whoever you are . . . and when I find out who you are . . . well . . . let’s just hope I don’t find out who you are.

Now if you know me personally, you know that I’m no expert here. But I believe most man-woman relationships fail because the attention was given to the relationship between the man and the woman. That’s all screwed up. A proper relationship would be set up like a triangle, with God at the top:

. .  . . . . . . . .   God

.

.

.

Woman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Man

Now if the woman focuses on getting closer to God, and the man focuses on getting closer to God, the result would be the man and woman getting closer to each other.

Craig Groeschel has a new book about this very idea called, “Going All the Way.” I haven’t read it yet, but the reviews are very impressive — saying how its great for singles and marrieds alike. I’m pumped about reading this book — you should be to. Go get it.

Recently I took a walk down to the park to read a book. There were several children playing in the park while I was reading, and I had tuned out all their talking and yelling — but certain words will catch your attention, you know what I mean? Here’s the conversation I heard, starting with the first statement that caught my attention (I’m approximating the ages):

3rd Grade Girl: Playboys get sperm all over their faces.

1st Grade Boy: You mean Playboy girls get sperm all over their faces.

3rd Grade Girl: Yea, Playboy girls. That’s what’s I meant. Ha ha. (All kids laughed)

5th Grade Boy: Ha Ha. My Uncle lets me look at those magazines.

… At this point I couldn’t hear anything else they said.

Some adults (caregivers of children) are really stupid. They actually let elementary children look at porn magazines. It’s a wonder they can be so stupid and still breathe. At least they are breathing — that’s more than they deserve anyhow.

Wake up, America. Wake up, Christians! I’m glad my church has children’s programs that are evangelistic — this is why. If you are a Christian and are bothered as I was (and it should bother you and it should offend you — that’s the whole point) — don’t just sit there. Do something. Combat this! You don’t fight spiritual problems with intellectual discussions. You combat spiritual problems with spiritual forces. Keep fighting, people. (Cue the Petra music…fade in slowly…).

Get on your knees and fight like a man . . .

One of my favorite shows is Judge Judy. She is so blunt, and most of the people she deals with on the show are complete idiots. Oh my goodness. I think its hilarious. Here’s a few bits of “wisdom” I’ve gathered from Judge Judy (this may or may not be wisdom — but they made me laugh!).

“They don’t keep me around here because I’m 5′ 6″ and gorgeous. They keep me here because I am very, very smart.”

“Put your kids in daycare and get a job!”

“Listen to me - you won’t solve your financial problems by making another baby.”

“Grow up! Your tears won’t make it with me.”

“I don’t want to hear ‘blah, blah, blah,’ I can hear ‘blah, blah, blah,’ when I talk with my three year old. Tell me the words he said!”

“If it doesn’t make sense its probably not true.”

(”Vern (the bailiff), would you get these children a place to sit outside the courtroom please? I am about to loose it.”

“You can’t get in the back door what you can’t get in the front door.” (THAT’S REAL WISDOM!)

“You’re a nasty, nasty lady.”

“Don’t just stand there — you look like an idiot.”

[Beginning of case] “This is a case where dumb is suing dumber. This should be short.”

And my absolute favorite is something that was said TO Judge Judy, “In the name of Jesus I’m going to smack the devil out of you!”

Here’s a list of my top ten favorite speakers. Now, they’re not good communicators — I just like the way they talk. Maybe you’ll get a kick out of it. So here’s my Top Ten list . . . only there’s five of them, not ten.

Floyd the Barber from the Andy Griffith Show.

Ernest T. Bass, also from the Andy Griffith Show.

Boomhauer (if you only watch one video - watch this one!)

This guy.

Tay Zonday.

Do you ever have a day where you just need to listen to some Herbie Hancock? For some reason, when I have a million things on my plate, listening to Herbie’s “Watermelon Man” helps me think about one thing at a time (and then accomplish more, or at least accomplish it sanely).

What’s your “Watermelon Man?” What’s your Herbie Hancock? What do you listen to when you’re in a particular funk?