Category: Funny

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Fireworks!

I saw the most amazing fireworks show two nights ago. Seriously — it was high quality fireworks being shot up well above rooftops all around my neighborhood. I just took a walk and I saw constant explosions all around me. It just kept going and going, and it was completely random. Nobody planned it. It wasn’t organized. Lots of people in the community just decided they wanted good fireworks, and the result was an amazing show for EVERYONE!

It was amazing how such a show could be created by random people doing their thing. Lots of people got involved and ta da — there was a fireworks show for all of East Auburn. Just imagine what could happen if lots of people got involved in their churches . . .

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Jesus Saves . . . Why Can’t I?

Argh! I just spent a hunk of time entering notes into the music notation software here at the church. I said to myself, “Adam, you should save your work in case your computer locks up.” I argued back, “Nah – I don’t need to save. This computer was just upgraded last fall, it’s not going to lock up.”

Well, it didn’t lock up. But the power went out. Everything just shut off for about one full second and came right back on. WEIRD!
When the power shut off I immediately knew that I hadn’t saved and that I had lost everything. After a few shouts at whoever caused the outage (I have no clue who or what caused it — but yelling at them seemed appropriate at the time – even if they couldn’t hear me) I got things fired back up. Calming down now.

Jesus saves. I guess I’m not as Christ-like as I thought I was.

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We All Have a Big Butt.

God has a calling for each of us. We (Christians) are all called to share the message of Jesus with those around us. We are all called to show God’s love to those we come in contact with every single day. We are all called to help develop other Christ followers (a.k.a. make disciples). It’s God’s will for each of us to spend time with Him every day. God’s called each of us to live holy lives. There also may be specific callings — for example, God might have called you to lead “Bill Johnson” (insert any specific name) to Christ. Or He might have called you to serve in the choir at church (or some other specific ministry).

We always have an excuse to get out of some of these things:

But I’m too busy . . .

But I’m so tired. I don’t feel like it . . .

But I worked in the nursery this morning, why do I need to have “God time” today? . . .

But . . .
But . . .

We all have a big but! Quit scratching your “but” and do what God’s called you to do!

This past weekend at Church our youth pastor did a fantastic job sharing the message where he used the phrase “we all have a big butt” to illustrate this idea. I thought it was great so I stole it and adapted it for my blog.

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Party at Adam’s House – BYOB!

BYOB = Bring your own BED!

And by “Adam’s House” I really do mean “ADAM’S House.” I have been in the process of getting a house for about 2 months – and I close on Wednesday! I get possession at closing (last I heard).

I have had a wonderful experience working with a very honest Christian mortage broker (one of the few good ones), a Christian realtor, and a Christian Insurance guy. When I have a business relationship with another Christian, I expect fair and honest treatment — not because I’m a Christian or because I work at a church — but because they are a Christian. Because of their faith in Christ I trust that they will treat me fairly — and if they don’t I know that God will clean their clock. Either way, I don’t need to worry. I can’t wait to have my house! I will be bringing my own bed.

-Adam Diehl

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Look in the Right Place.

Last summer when I was in Oklahoma I went out and purchased a $40 metronome. It had some pretty cool features that I didn’t have on my other metronome that I had left back here in Indiana.

Now when I got back to Indiana the end of last summer, I brought this new metronome to the church office so I could utilize it to its fullness.

Then I dropped it.

Since then it just hasn’t worked like I wanted it to. It will be going along JUST FINE until you touch it . . . then the whole thing just shuts down. It’s so frustrating!

Yesterday I was working on the timing of this one song with my piece of crap metronome and of course it stopped working about halfway through the chorus. Then lighting struck my brain – CHECK THE BATTERIES!

I opened up the back case of the metronome to find the generic batteries that came with the metronome. I replaced them with top notch Duracell Procell batteries and now my metronome works like a $40 metronome ought to! I felt like an idiot.
-Adam Diehl

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Today, Yesterday, and the Day Before That.

I have been sick. Monday was really bad — I couldn’t even roll over in bed without cautious. Yesterday and today have been a lot better – but I’m still a little “out of it.” I have to lead worship tonight for our midweek service, and I’m trusting God to make up for my sickness.

My grandma moved into a retirement community a few weeks ago. My aunt and cousin are flying in tonight to visit us. That should be fun.

I have been living at home with my parents ever since I came back from my internship in Tulsa, Oklahoma last August. It’s time I found my own place. I made an offer on a house nearly three weeks ago. Before they could accept, reject, or counter my offer the seller’s bank had to check things out and get an appraisal and stuff. It took awhile. But just today I got a phone call saying that the only thing keeping my offer from being accepting is the bank’s board who says “yes” or “no” — and the appraiser is recommending that they say “yes.” So it looks like my offer is going to go through. Woot! I’m gonna have a house!

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Once Upon a Time at a Hotel.

I’m out of town right now for a convention and I’m staying in a hotel. You might recall a few days ago I made a blog mentioning that I liked using shampoo that smelled good.

I used the hotel’s shampoo last night and it didn’t smell very good. Now don’t get me wrong — it did smell — just not very good. It was sort of a “fruity pebbles” smell.

I also forgot to pack deodorant. Stay away from me today, folks. Stay away. Just kidding. There was a store right next to the hotel that I could buy some nice deodorant. The hotel probably had some free stuff, but with the shampoo smelling like fruity pebbles there was no telling what their deodorant would be like — so I went ahead and bought the good stuff.

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American Gladiators.

I feel old. I saw American Gladiators on ESPN Classic. ESPN CLASSIC! ESPN Classic is for old sports shows, like Superbowl I or a basketball game in 1968. ESPN Classic isn’t supposed to show sports shows that I can actually remember. Oh well, this was bound to happen sooner or later.

I used to watch American Gladiators all the time when I was little. Nitro was my favorite. There was also Gemini, Storm, Ice, Lace, Turbo, and Viper. In the show, these American Gladiators dressed in spandex and competed against challengers in different events.

On the show, my favorite event was “The Assault.” In this event, the Gladiator was positioned high up on the end of a playing field with a tennis ball canon. The challenger had stations, the first was far away from the Gladiator, and the following stations were positioned closer and closer to the front where the Gladiator was shooting at them with the canon. At each station, the challenger had one opportunity to shoot a target near the Gladiator. If the Gladiator shot the challenger with a tennis ball — he won. If the challenger shot the Gladiator’s “target,” then the challenger won. It was a great event of strategy and suspense.

I’ll never forget this time my parents were in a meeting at our old church building. I was probably 8 years old. My brother would have been about 14 or 15. Our parents were in a meeting, so we set up an “assault court” in one of the classrooms. On one end of the room Nathan climbed on top of a high stack of chairs with a Nerf gun. We set up “stations” of chairs around the room. I started on the opposite side of the room and ran from station to station of chairs while my brother tried to shoot me with the Nerf gun. I remember diving, rolling, and sliding behind chairs. That was so exciting.

We got in trouble — but it was totally worth it.