Recently I’ve been extremely busy. Now let me reiterate that … extremely busy. When I get stressed like that, I tend to do a hard shift to “Control Country” when it comes to my life and I get tunnel focus. Seriously – if it doesn’t help me accomplish something on my calendar or to-do list, I don’t do it. I’m not saying that’s good – I’m just saying that’s what I do. When this goes on for several days it gets to an unhealthy state… I start thinking things like… (I’m not even joking here…):
“I don’t have time to eat a meal — that’s time wasted.”
“I’ve needed to use the bathroom for 2 hours, but I can finish these three other things before I take that break. Urinating wouldn’t be the most productive use of my time – it’d be time wasted.”
“24 hours in a day – I’ll spend 8 at my office and 10 working at home. I can relax with the remaining 6 hours.”
Obviously with this pattern, it would be easy for me to have this “wasted time” mentality when it comes to my God time as well. But that’s the worst thing I could do. In the stressful times is when I need the God time the MOST.
So last Friday night God was dealing with me about this, and I just came to the conclusion that if my “God time” was wasted time, then I want to get wasted. I want to absolutely ruin and waste my life if that’s the case. All the stuff that’s “me” can be ruined and wasted if it means being closer to Jesus. I love Jesus.
Immediately after that moment, I started shouting out my prayer and promise to God. Then I began spontaneously singing it to a melody that I had actually written 8 months ago.
I want to be wasting my life seeking You. I won’t let anybody get in my way of reaching You. I want to be wasting my life finding You. And I won’t let the devil get my focus away from You.
It took me several hours figuring out how to use my new recording equipment, but I used this song to experiment with the features. I’m posting the whole deal… including a long and snazzy hip-hop keyboard solo and some very out-of-tune background vocals (sorry…). There’s some rough spots, but give me a break its the first thing I’ve ever done on my new equipment. Give it a listen, click here.
Lyrics and Recording are copyright Adam Diehl 2008…. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST! 😀